I seam to go through a lot of struggles daily and this is usually caused by my over thinking for sure.
It becomes like a statick energy waiting to explode.
It’s 10pm here and quite early and I feel…relaxed. I am looking forward to putting on a Karl Pilkington pod cast and falling asleep.
I realised something today 6 weeks ago I stopped drinking energy drinks. I kicked a habit. There has been days I could murder on but I did it.
I’m loosing weight because of it.
So I struggled with that but now I no that I can make changes to my life even if they are small I just got to focus up!
So for those of you who read my blogs will know that I suffer (boy does it feel like it atm) from anxiety.
When I first started writing blogs I had just had my first anxiety attack and break down.
During that period I walked out of my job and had lost my best friend over my own clouded horrible actions.
I started to turn it around.
I got into one on one therapy and group . The group was a writing one .
I then got a new job. I also attended the gym quite often . Almost daily. I was losing weight and feeling good about myself. I was making progress.
My new job next that I could afford a holiday . So off I went with my best friends to Turkey . It was awesome.
When I came back it wasn’t long before I was offered a pay rise at work and to become kitchen manager / Head chef.
This meant that my pay would be a little better than when I was working in the call center. (A job I think that helped cause a lot of anxiety but the pay tempted me.)
Seams like everything is on the up ,right ?
Wrong. Getting this job caused someone to stand down. This is causing people to begin bitching about me etc.
I’ve got into the habit off 2 energy drinks at the start of the day and drink pop threw out.
7:30am – 6:30pm shifts also put me off the gym. So the weight is coming back. So back in the gym I shall go next week.
This morning I have replaced my energy drinks with diet coke and water threw the day.
Also working at a pub/restaurant has led me to often have a few beers after work. So I’m going to have to stop that two.
Time to get back on track & hope I don’t lose my shit first .